Classy behavior creates classy brands – a memorable encounter with Lauren Bacall
Cookie-cutter or stand-out?
In the days before selfies and raw cut video, people were memorable for a reason.
While I’ve had the privilege of meeting and working with a number of celebrities in my career, few top the class exhibited by the late Lauren Bacall. What might that mean for you and your personal brand? Allow me to relate this story.
Several years ago I was a 30-something participant in a special event at the Kennedy Center in Washington, D.C. There were several famous people there, I of course decidedly not being one of them.
During dinner I noticed that sitting some 10 feet away was none other than my favorite actress: Lauren Bacall. I had no idea what to do.
Finally, gathering up courage, I stood up, walked over and stammered, “Excuse me, Ms. Bacall, this is completely unprofessional, but may I have your autograph?”
She slowly looked up at me, and I immediately panicked. I had for sure stepped over a boundary.
Instead, she smiled and humorously replied in her famous sultry voice, “Are you certain that is all you want?” With one short sentence, I was rendered incapable of speech, an uncommon state for yours truly.
Remarkably, the chair next to her was vacant, and she motioned. Again in that famous sultry voice: “Why don’t you sit down?”
I hadn’t counted on this.
I somehow meekly complied, knees knocking. No sooner had I sat down than a familiar voice boomed: “That’s great. Nobody asked ME for MY autograph!” Then another familiar voice sneered in reply: “That’s because you don’t count!” It was actors Walter Matthau and Jack Lemmon, both in “Odd Couple” character sitting across the table.
The merely overwhelming quickly cascaded into outright paralysis. My vocal cords, together with any cerebral capacity that I once possessed, completely ceased to function.
Ms. Bacall turned to me (I was still completely speechless), leaned over, and chuckled in her low voice: “See what kind of company I’m forced to keep?”
The table resumed its banter, and Ms. Bacall set this now-rather nervous fan at ease with a number of questions about where I was from and how was I enjoying the evening. I’m certain my replies were unremarkable, but she wasn’t.
Finally, she asked how I would like her autograph in the event souvenir book. After writing out a short entry, she passed it to Lemmon, sternly instructing him: “Write something civil.” Matthau then asked whether he was permitted to autograph the book, to which Lemmon noted that it should be the high point of his day. All laughed together.
Autographed book now in hand, I stood to take my leave, shaking hands all around. Ms. Bacall’s classy farewell? “Next time come when you can stay longer.”
To this day, the encounter with Lauren Bacall is one of my favorite memories. She obviously had a presence and a personal brand that was truly remarkable in person. What might be some takeaways for us today?
Civility counts. Regardless of one’s stature in life, being kind in any situation is a strategic plus.
It never hurts to be charming. Take a risk. Next time you meet someone, go out of your way to be delightful and memorable.
Use other people’s names – everyone likes to hear their name in a positive light. When Lauren Bacall used my name, it was in a way I’ll never forget.
People remember how you exit. The saying goes “We are known by our entrances and exits,” but I would wager that the exit line is the most memorable. How do you end phone conversations or end in-person discussions? Mumbling nothingness or memorable phrase?
Be genuine and authentic in your recognition. We all generally feel better when people seem glad to see us. That includes unspoken non-verbal communication as well as the spoken word. Be a total package when it comes to recognizing people.
In my experience, too many people miss simple, but remarkable opportunities to be memorable. Two decades ago a famous actress took 10 minutes to create a wonderful memory and a classy experience for a nondescript stranger, one that has lasted a lifetime.
What great memory, what personal brand, are you going to create today?
By Michael Snyder, Managing Principal, The MEK Group